Can't Sit Still...

I have come to the conclusion today that I don't know how to relax. I always have to be doing something, eating something, reading something, watching something, something, ANYTHING all the time. I don't know how to take a day and just sit at home. It honestly stresses me out when I have nothing to do, and I don't know if its just because I'm in London, and I feel like I need to enjoy every minute while I'm here, or if its because that's just the type of person I am. I feel like there's a slight possibility that I may be insane.

*These are some examples of my insanity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anyway, I just don't really know how to slow myself down, or maybe I don't really want to. I want to try everything, do everything, see everything, meet everyone (well, maybe I don't want to meet everyone, but I do want to meet more people than I know right now). Even when I'm tired, I always feel like I have to push through so that I can keep going. Then, of course, there are those moments where I completely pass out from exhaustion and then I wake up extremely confused as to what's going on. I am guessing something like this may occur tomorrow after my morning technique class, so maybe I should just plan on taking a nap. Although, the only problem with planning a nap is that when I lay down and say that I'm actually taking the time out to sleep for a while, I never end up falling asleep. Its only when I really don't have time for it at all that I accidentally fall sleep. Its a vicious cycle.

Tomorrow is my second week of graduate school, and I get tired just thinking about it. Mondays and Tuesdays for me are my lightest days of my four day school week because I only have technique class  in the morning, but then Wednesdays and Thursdays are killer! I go from so early in the morning all the way into the evening, and I just get so drained by the end of it. A part of me doesn't like that and, of course, the crazed wanting-to-be-busy-all-the-time me enjoys it. That insane stress-craving me wants the entire week to be non-stop class all day long! Its like I'm a glutton for punishment. On one hand, its very nice having class only two days a week, but on the other hand, I definitely could use something else. Possibly a job? But in order for me to have a job here, I need something called a "National Insurance Number," which is the equivalent to the social security number back in the States, and I haven't sorted that out yet. So, I have to wait... but I hate waiting. I want to be busy, and I want to be busy now. I'm even having a hard time focusing on this blog right now. I can't sit still, and I can't think of only one thing because I always have to have a million and one thoughts running through my head. Honestly, is there something wrong with me? There probably is. Ehh... maybe I'll go write some postcards, or make a sandwich, or run around my apartment. Oh, geez.